Mommie Dearest, better known as Joan Crawford, was a living nightmare for her children. Compulsively clean, the actress had a bizarre morning beauty regime the involved scrubbing her face with boiling hot water. While you may not want to dunk your face in rubbing alcohol, you can still achieve the Mommie Dearest look with a peel-off cucumber mask. Of course, we know the real reason you want to copy this style is because you want another excuse to scream “NO WIRE HANGERS.”

Patricia Krentcil, better known as Tan Mom, made headlines in 2012 when she was accused of taking her child to a tanning salon. If you’re looking to achieve that same glowing hue, we’d recommend several cans of the spray-on tanner.

Peggy is the matriarch of the dysfunctional Bundy family on Married with Children. Her likes include bonbons, talk shows and shopping. Her dislikes include taking care of her children, cooking, cleaning, and Al.

In Orange is the New Black, Galina “Red” Reznikov (Kate Mulgrew) runs the prison kitchen, not to mention a lot of the behind-the-scenes business. As a mother figure, she’ll take you under her wing, but if you cross her, you’ll be sent to bed without dinner.

Bob Belcher is the owner and chef of Bob’s Burgers, a humble family-run restaurant. Although Bob’s cooking is excellent, the business suffers from all kinds of misfortunes, but it always bounces back with its Grand Re-Re-Openings.

In Wet Hot American Summer, Gene Jenkinson (Christopher Meloni) is a shell-shocked Vietnam vet who finds his calling as a summer camp chef. With the help of his friend, a talking can of vegetables, he’s able to help Coop win over his crush Katie.